Hi Friend
I’m sitting in St. Louis as I write you. Yesterday (Friday) Lainey moved into her dorm room. She’s starting her new adventure at St. Louis University. It’s amazing how a blank two bunk sterile room can transform into a cozy bungalow in just a matter of hours.
My daughter is probably the most hilarious person I know. Sometimes she’s subtle, often time overt. Her sense of humor and ability to articulate herself is amazing. Whether serious or silly the girl has an ability to use her expressions, body, tone and keen observations to brighten and lighten any situation.
I’m heading to the convocation in just a couple of hours, where they will encourage parents to go home and trust that their kid is going to be just fine. I’m certainly not worried about that. Lainey conquered Los Angeles last year on her gap year, she’ll kill it on this college campus too.
This is her new home for a four year season. That tiny two-bunk room converted into a transported home. They say “home is where the heart is” but it also seems to require lots of knick-knacks, pictures, and memorabilia from our actual physical home. Have you ever heard someone refer to someone else as their home?
What Makes Your Home?
When I was growing up we moved eight times from my birth til graduation. I can picture seven of them, inside and out. I have recollections of my parents, brothers, friends, cousins and neighborhood kids inside different spaces. I vividly recall the yards too. Lots of playing and mowing happened on several different landscapes.
My kids were born and raised all in one home. Their momma still lives in that home. I recall in great detail purchasing that abode in February of 1999. My son arrived in December of that same year. The addition of him, altered entirely what that home felt like.
Each of us need home. Each of us want home.
Home Creates
Deep Sense of Security
Wide Dynamic Range of Emotions
Our Best & Worst Selves
Expressions & Experiences of Love
Freedom to Be
A home both reflects and shapes our identity.
Whether we grew up in a good home or unhealthy home; Had a functional or dysfunctional family; Enjoyed or disliked our upbringing; Look back fondly or with disdain; We are all on a quest to create home – for ourselves and those we love. We yearn for home!
Instigating Ideas
1. Define what Home means to you.
2. Ask someone to tell you one of their most favorite childhood memories.
3. What traditions do you carry on that represent your home?
4. Invite someone into your home for a meal.
The most obvious element of a home is the family relationships that exist within it. Those trump any physical structure. As parents in all our efforts to create a “good home” for our kids, it simply comes down to our consistency in their life, regardless of where that parenting takes place. We can move 100 times and still have a strong home life!
What I appreciate so much about my daughter is her ability to provide a home for so many others by the way she invites them into her life. Granted, not everyone gets that chance, but those that do, find themselves feeling “at home” with her. I admire that quality in her.
What if we were the kind of people who offered all of the benefits a home creates (listed above) to those both in our personal and professional lives? I suspect we’d be entirely satisfied in life!
I would love to hear a story about how you grew up and what your home was like. Also, how you perceive “home” these days and if you have any insights into creating one? Please Share!