Hi Friend
It’s happening. That thing that occurs towards the end of every year. I start having conversations with myself about “when the new year gets here…” Whether eating habits, daily activities, morning routines or new priorities the sense (and belief) that as 2021 dawns, I have a window of opportunity to become more of who I want to be. Well, not right away, but it’s the impetus to put in motion those designs.
I like time-based identifiers. Could be cause I like Time so much. He’s one of my best friends. So utilizing his characteristics as a catalyst for my own personal progress or attempts at progress seems appropriate. As you might know, my birthday is in June, so every six months I get these pivotal moments to evaluate and make decisions that feel like they matter. I’m not alone in this method.
I mean, gyms are sustained by all the people who sign up with autopay in January and fade away by February, but keep paying every month. Dreaming big is fun. Goal setting is inspiring. Putting lots of energy into imagining the future rejuvenates us.
Weirdly what’s equally as fun is looking forward to doing those things, but not necessarily what comes out of them. Aspiring to achieve is thrilling, doing the daily work to actually accomplish those ambitions is not so riveting. That’s why the other conversation arrives with the one mentioned above: “Why wait till the new year? Why don’t you start acting that way NOW?”
Fortunately, I’ve got lots of great reasons to refrain from such silliness. Holidays are approaching, schedules are inconsistent, pacing is altered and it’s just too unpredictable how life will be in November and December.
Deceptive Encouragement is Oddly Satisfying!
It startles and saddens me how easily I can deceive myself. That’s another great characteristic of Time, that I’m not as fond of – the ability to look back over weeks, months and years and have Reality Data burst any sense of delusion I’m trying to wrap myself up in.
Certainly this is why we give up. We start looking back over life and decisions and realize that the energy we put in to imagination was the most we exerted. Or worse, we make attempts that don’t produce what we hoped it would. It can take some time, but eventually it seems like a reasonable perspective emerges of “Why bother?”
That question really does need answered. Have you ever had someone bother you? Have you had a situation that was bothersome? It’s annoying, agitating, distracting, unsettling and an irritant.
Why bother?
What about setting goals and attempting to become something we’re not is so irritating? Is the reflection in the mirror so unacceptable that something must be done?!
Why bother?
What about acknowledging our suckage is so frustrating? Is our current capacity for accomplishment so small that it must be altered?
Why bother?
What about realizing our potential still has margin and possibility underutilized? Is where we are in life not good enough?
Why bother?
It’s curious how the sting of annoyance about our own mediocrity surges around this time and then slowly (or quickly) dissipates. Is it surprising that we continue in patterns and habits that have gotten us to this place in life? It’s extremely bothersome to make changes. Most of us are searching for ways to be less agitated. Who seeks out a thorn-in-the-flesh to remain unsettled? That sounds painful.
High standards are a bother.
Giving grace is bothersome.
Being transparently candid bothers.
Thinking better is a bother.
Empathy is bothersome.
Commitment to consistency bothers.
Have you heard someone say “I couldn’t be bothered by…” It’s a phrase that feels aloof and sorta superior. Like, whatever that thing is, it’s not worthy of my time or attention. Certainly, we don’t feel that way about our own lives? Yet creating them to be something more significant is a real bother.
Living with purpose is annoying! Any worthwhile growth will ultimately be about our service to others. The more we grow the less selfish we become. How bothersome!
Instigating Ideas
1. What do others find bothersome about you?
2. What characteristic about yourself are you most bothered by?
3. Intentionally give grace to someone this week who really bothers you.
4. What’s one goal you have achieved that makes you proud?
Creating a list of things that bother you wouldn’t be difficult. Requiring you to make effort to change them would shorten that list substantially. Pointing that annoying eye at ourselves generates a lot of tolerance.
Going into this season of reflection and anticipation, I hope you find that you are extremely bothered by certain aspects of your life.
I dare you to identify a 2021 goal early and implement it while 2020 still remains. I would love to hear what’s so bothersome in your life that you can’t wait any longer to accelerate change – and how you do it. Please Share.