Hi Friend,
How could this not be an amazing week?! My son was in town from Chicago and I got to spend a couple of great days with him! My daughter flew off to Los Angeles to surprise some friends on her fall break, which I think is absolutely the best and sounds like something I would do. When our kids are thriving, how can we not be? The umbilical cord to our heart is never severed.
I didn’t fly anywhere this week, but did make a few road trips. I made a quick drive up to Kansas City and had some delicious BBQ. I went to Tulsa twice. I saw Black Adam with my usual movie buddies. I celebrated my friend Rebecca’s five year business anniversary. I previewed a hotel ballroom where I’m speaking next month. We shot videos for an upcoming #BestDaily campaign. Fun times!
I know that’s scattered. Sometimes processing out loud as I type helps me bring into focus what stands out to determine where this letter might go. I still don’t know, but I’ll keep typing. One other thing I did this week was sit through a Webinar-of-sorts about writing a book. Monica, John and I all attended it and came away with some strong thoughts.
All of us who speak are regularly asked if we have a book. Equally we are told that we should write a book. As a communicator, I’m a big fan of the written word. I mean, look how long I’ve been writing these letters every week (7 years in January). I’ve held the disposition that just because you can speak well, doesn’t mean you can write well. And certainly if write well, doesn’t mean you can speak. Hello. However…
I Have Limiting Beliefs
After the webinar concluded, the three of us chatted about what our perspectives have been on writing a book. (Monica has already written two, BTW). It turns out we have certain beliefs and ideas that have allowed us to justify NOT going down that path.
One of my biggest hold-ups is that I don’t want to be redundant. I’ve read so much over the years that has sounded like they took it from Covey, Maxwell, or Drucker and don’t even know it. I have a bit of an attitude about such things I suppose. So the last thing I want is to do the same.
One of the points of the webinar was that “Your Voice” will always be uniquely you. Even if it’s covering an age-old topic. Obviously people believe this or how could anyone conclude “I need to write a book about Leadership!” Because the other 80,000 books haven’t quite got it right???
I Fear Being Similar
I’m self-aware enough to know I have a disdain for being grouped in with the averages. Part of my core values is being distinct. Yet that very aspiration IS common to most. I get the irony. In all my efforts to be uniquely me, I’m just like everyone else. Ugh. As with most fears we haven’t confronted head on, it will seep into multiple areas of our life, prohibiting us from taking chances.
Do you know what fears permeate your soul? They act as an unseen driver automating many of our decisions, without us recognizing it. Once identified we can at least deal with reality. And if so bold, say it out loud to others, which gets us that much closer to conquering them. I’ve never said out loud “I’m afraid to write a book because it might be ordinary.” Which in turns means I’M GENERIC.
Fear and lies go hand-in-hand!
Instigating Ideas…
1. Are you able to clearly articulate your deepest fears?
2. What are some goals you are unwilling to pursue?
3. Encourage someone who has a limiting belief.
4. I dare you to share a real fear with someone.
I’m not sure fears go away OR if we just muster a bit more courage-than-fear so we take steps of faith despite it’s taunting refrain. I hope this weekly letter ENCOURAGES you – infuses you with courage – but I’ve found even more useful is accountability. Making a brave decision, then staying disciplined to follow through, repeatedly if necessary, is buoyed by people holding us to it.
I deeply believe in the power of words. They are containers of faith, whether spoken by others or ourselves. However, a long term endeavor like writing a book or transforming yourself from a past life, takes ongoing relationships that remind us of our commitment.
Keeping that vision – that consequence of courage – in view, is extraordinarily useful.
We may have to reframe the priority of our beliefs. I may need to see myself MORE as someone who willingly puts himself out there OVER being someone who is distinct. Our beliefs change our identity. How do you need to reshuffle your beliefs about yourself to assist you in conquering fears?
I would love to hear how you have overcome fear in your life, whether permanently or temporarily so you could achieve something in your heart? What resources have you utilized to access sustained courage or simply diminish fear overall? Please Share!