Hi Friend
I’ve asked John to write the Instigator this week. As you know, I just got married Friday night, so waking up Saturday morning and writing, probably wasn’t going to happen. Enjoy John…
“What if peace was a better measurement than productivity?” This provocative question challenges the very core of our modern hustle culture and my overfilled calendar. We often equate success with how much we accomplish in a day, how busy we are, or how much we produce. But what if, instead, we measured our lives by the peace we experience? This shift in perspective can be transformative, steering us away from relentless striving and toward a more balanced and fulfilling existence.
Mindset and Success
Our thoughts shape our reality, and as the saying goes, “You become what you give your mind to.” If we constantly focus on stress, competition, and the never-ending to-do list, our lives will mirror that chaos. Conversely, when we cultivate a mindset centered on gratitude, we can transform our experience of the world.
I recently had the honor of hosting two-time gold medalist Lindsay Tarpley for a keynote speech, fireside chat, and soccer clinic in Shawnee, Oklahoma. Her comments were made with unapologetic confidence. I was shaken and inspired by her deep belief in all she had accomplished and what she was willing to take on in the future. What amazed me was my disconnect in the moment between the incredible career she’s had and the reality that without an absolute winner’s mindset, she wouldn’t have ended her career with record-breaking hardware and a legend’s status. Grateful to those that have invested in her, she neither plays it small nor fails to intentionally acknowledge her teammates, coaches, and greatest supporters.
The Power of Gratitude
Gratitude plays a crucial role in transforming our mindset. It’s easy to be thankful when things are going well, but true gratitude is “grown in the soils of hardship and sacrifice.” When we learn to find gratitude even in our struggles, we unlock a powerful tool for resilience and joy. This doesn’t mean ignoring challenges or pretending everything is perfect. Instead, it means recognizing the silver linings, the lessons learned, and the growth that comes from adversity.
A key source of gratitude came last week as my closest friend’s family faced very challenging circumstances with a medical emergency. I won’t get into the details, but I’ve watched them stare down fear, relational complexity, and major medical odds. Two weeks of these realities, and I am deeply grateful to run with a person who runs into obstacles to serve others.
A second example came this week as I started conducting performance reviews. Too often, we fail to communicate the opportunities for improvement through the lens of the value they bring to our teams. Despite having heartfelt feedback for each of my direct reports, I took an opportunity to remind them of all of what I see in them now and what’s possible in their future. Whenever possible, providing professional mirroring gives gratitude to my heart and confidence to theirs.
Summertime Reflection
As we move into the summer months, life tends to slow down a bit. This season offers a perfect opportunity for reflection and review. With Greg getting married (Wooo!), it’s a joyous reminder of the overlap between our personal and professional lives. Summer is a natural pause, a half-time in our year, allowing us to assess our goals, celebrate our achievements, and recalibratetoward what’s important. This time of reflection is crucial for maintaining a balanced mindset, fostering gratitude for what we’ve accomplished, and re-setting intentions for what lies ahead.
Practical Steps to Cultivate a Positive Mindset
1. Daily Gratitude Practice: Start each day by listing three things you’re grateful for. This simple practice can shift your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant in your life.
2. Roses and Thorns Check-In: Implement a practical Roses and Thorns check-in during team meetings. Ask each team member to share one positive aspect (roses) and one challenge (thorns) they are experiencing. This helps create an environment of understanding and demonstrates a culture of gratitude.
3. Focus on Moments of Learning: At the end of each day, reflect on moments where you learned something new. This could be a new skill, a piece of advice, or a personal insight. Recognizing these moments reinforces their importance.
Check in With Yourself
Incorporating gratitude into our lives is more than just a mental exercise; it’s a way to enrich our everyday experiences. Here are some instigating questions to help you check in with yourself:
- Do you measure success by productivity or peace?
- When did you last express gratitude in a tough situation?
- How can you practice daily gratitude and reflection?
By shifting our focus from mere productivity to these deeper values, we create a more fulfilling, balanced, and peace-filled life. Remember, “You become what you give your mind to,” so let’s give our minds to gratitude and watch what we see move in a positive direction.