Hi Friend
What an amazing week. I got to speak at the National Indigenous Native American WIC Conference. I a did a year and a half culture consultancy with the Chickasaw Nation Nutrition Services department 7 or 8 years ago. I became good friends with Melinda who was in charge. I loved seeing her and being back in that world.
I also rode my bike at Arcadia this week. Monica and I had a blast shooting a Customer Service video for our consulting client’s conference. We’re not in town for the multiple days it goes on, so we shot a video. I’ve also started serving in the Kids Ministry at my church. It’s humbling on many levels. This week we booked two events in 2024 during the same week. That’s always fun!
The coolest thing this week was concluding on the Values Refresh we’ve been doing at the Regional Food Bank of Oklahoma. I love that place. I love the people. A decade ago, the founder invited me to partner with him to discover the values and articulate them in a purposeful way. That was the legacy he wanted to leave.
He had been there 38 years and what mattered most was shaping an environment for the work to continue on and for the people to bring their same level of passion and commitment. We spent about eight months going through the process and came out with three powerful values. They sustained the Food Bank for 10 years, 2 more CEO’s and an entirely new Officer’s Team.
VALUES MATTER
This time since we were doing a “refresh” – evaluating if they required an update – we allotted three months. It was the perfect amount of time and meetings to discover what was needed. I met with the Officer’s team and another group separately, dubbed the Square Root Group, who are a sampling from every department. They possess all the best qualities of a person who thrives there.
The conversations were robust, intense, challenging, fun, interesting and satisfying. There’s an amazing level of investment when someone cares. The level of truth we are willing to offer creates the level of intimacy we can experience. I know we don’t think of our professional colleagues as “intimate” but opening up our hearts and articulating matters that we hold personally meaningful, does foster closeness.
Let’s Be Intimate
For several years we’ve had a lot of conversations about vulnerability, candidness, transparency and bringing our “full self” to work. I mean, authenticity still rages as an admired attribute. With all that I haven’t heard the term “intimacy” uttered at all. Yet, those characteristics produce just that! We must be maintaining a level of guardedness even in our openness?
I understand intimacy carries a degree of sacredness. It’s reserved for only the safest relationships. Maybe it only can exist where love resides? Or it’s too closely related to sexual activity? Or it’s so scary we reserve it for one or two humans? Is it rude to have several relationships that involve intimacy? (It kind of feels like it, huh?)
What I experienced these last three months was a level of professional intimacy that enabled a legitimate outcome everyone is deeply vested in.
Instigating Ideas…
1. Go ride a bike.
2. Consider if your personal or professional values need refreshed?
3. Validate and appreciate someone who is willing to be vulnerable.
4. Exert courage and be less guarded.
We haven’t rolled out the values to the board or staff yet, so I can’t share them here. The process prompted the above thoughts. The people in both groups LOVE the mission, the work and the people they do it with. Our conversations were practical and passionate, functional and emotional – everyone shared deeply meaningful thoughts.
Exposure is Intimacy
The loneliness epidemic in our nation is rooted in individuals not having intimate relationships. Thick trust is required and many are weary from broken trust and the inability to discern who is trustworthy. It’s a risky business revealing our inner world. Our own commitment to truth enables the audacity to foster multiple intimate relationships with friends and colleagues. Which, by the way, produces the deepest, most satisfying, meaningful conversations and results.
I hope this week you open yourself to the adventure of intimacy. I dare you to be more transparent and heart-centric in your conversations at work, with friends and at home. It’s worth the risk!