Hi Friend
It’s been another big week. Lincoln moved off to Chicago Friday. Before doing so, he brought his car to the house, because he’s selling it. This used car market is just as crazy as you’ve heard. He sold it for 25% less than what he paid for it six years and 50,000 miles ago. It also has a salvage title, because of hail damage. Sold the same day he listed it at that price. 😳
He came over this week to help me put up ceiling fans on my back porch. I’m outside a lot. I’m sitting here now, actually. The birds and squirrels always keep me company. There were just lights mounted, so I removed those. To be clear, neither Lincoln nor I are very handy, but we were having a go at it. As of today, I still have two open electrical outlets in my ceiling. 😏
As Lincoln does, his first step was pulling up youtube videos so we could figure out what to do. He went outside and came back in and said “We can’t mount those, they won’t hold it.” I had no idea what he was talking about. Turns out, the fans need to be mounted to something that can hold 35lbs. The mounts currently installed are rated for 15lbs.
Mission abandoned.
I texted some construction friends and they sent me pictures of the bracketing needed to get these fans up. Way way way above anything I could attempt. I have an electrician scheduled in two weeks.
Have you ever started something and in the middle of it discovered what was required was significantly more than you had anticipated, prepared for, or were capable of?
Decide to Continue or Abort?
I love the book Thinking Fast and Slow. It’s a hard book to read, but soooooo amazingly interesting and insightful. It’s neurology, social science, psychology, and business all wrapped in a hardy package. One of the takeaways that impacted my life was that the author, Daniel Kahneman, said the majority of us stay with things waaaaaaay toooooo long, before giving up.
Who likes to give up? Who has ever worn that as a badge of honor? Where do we find people bragging about quitting, except for bad habits? Have you ever seen anyone list “I quit quickly” as one of their strengths? But that’s exactly what it is: A Super Power. Being able to walk away from something you’ve invested time, money, energy, and yourself in is extremely difficult.
“Just one more week… Just one more try… Just one more time… Just one more approach…”
In business, the phrase is “throwing good money after bad.” Meaning that it’s already proven it’s not going to work out, so why do we keep trying?
We really want it to work.
We don’t want to accept we wasted time and money.
We think it reflects on us.
“Don’t quit” is engrained in our psyche.
We have a redeemable mindset. We try to recoup something from our efforts. To let go completely and walk away entirely burdens the soul enormously. Yet, research and experience show that we’re better off the sooner we are able to do so.
Between you and me, I fall into the majority category. I lean way into perseverance, persistence, and hope. I like a good resurrection story. I like seeing myself as someone who will go the extra mile or five to make something happen. I like the idea of tenacity paying off. I suspect I’m common in that way, though I’ve been known to exert uncommon effort to see an idea realized.
Instigating Ideas…
1. What is something you need to walk away from?
2. What’s your opinion of people who give up?
3. Have you ever bragged about quitting?
The beauty of my fans is that though we stopped immediately trying it ourselves, by calling in an expert, I’ll still get them hung. Is there a relationship or outside expert you could include that would expedite the thing you can’t get to come to fruition? It may cost more money than time like in my case, but it will be done right.
How can we rewire our brains to embrace the idea that quitting on something we’ve been trying to make happen is a smart move? It was such a contrary thought to me, so when I read it in the context of everything else in that book, I decided to believe it. Practicing it is harder.
I want to be better at quitting.
I would love to hear how you have navigated letting go or giving up on something that was important to you? Or if you continually find wins in persisting. Please Share.